I lost my way. O LOOK! Heart Arrows!!!

So apparently this thing called Valentines Day is coming up or something...I dunno. Apparently I am supposed to be a good wife (the husband likes the say WIFE in a British Accent, think Russell Crowe in Robin Hood. On that note, yes Russell Crowe you can take me away anytime. The husband wont mind at all!) and get the husband something and then he's supposed to get me something. It's one of thooooose days.

WELL we like to call it Anti-Valentines Day Day. I really hate Valentines Day, LOATHE it. I don't care that others enjoy the day. That's cool. I support your love for love day. We don't really do anything on Anti-Valentines Day Day, known as AVDD because I'm lazy and do not want to type it all out. Or Ctrl C&V it.

Anyways, as I was saying. Apparently this day is arriving. How can I tell? Ooooo just the obscene amount of hearts and red popping up everywhere at school. Also little cock heart arrows leading you to the booth of LOVE (please give us 5$ to give your love note to your love in class) that you can't miss. But you know, the arrows add to the decor! This really is not a rant, I'm giggling right now. Honestly I am.

So what do we do on this day of love or AVDD? We watch stupid movies and order out food. This year we are going apartment hunting and then going out for Indian food and lots of beer. No cards, no expensive jewelry (I'm getting sick of those peoples commercials!!), no chocolate. Well maybe chocolate but only because I like chocolate and buy it a lot so it's nothing special. The husband might get flowers though, and I DO like flowers. O, and we are doing this on the 18th.

The whole point of my post is that this day is coming up and I remembered something a few days ago about how the husband asked me out waaaaaaaaay back when I was 16 and he was 19. I just randomly thought about it while watching Dexter and then I giggled for awhile while telling the husband my memory. And then told him I would blog about it because that's what loving wives do. RIGHT?

The scene: Cloudyish day, he asks me if I want to go for a little walk (I think he wanted to get away from friends). There is a cemetery beside the school, we stop there.

The husband: So are we dating?
Me: Uhhhh.......I guess.

We then walk back to friends and announce we are now a couple.

It was pretty awesome. And would you look at that, in October of this year it will be 9 years since that "So are we dating"?

I also remembered something else. I don't know if the husband remembers this, but for me It was the moment where I thought "Hey, this could be the one". I never really believed in THE ONE before that moment but I had this surge of emotion and...peace, I guess. It was pretty incredible.

I had just failed a math test (big surprise) and was really upset. I forgot that I was meeting the husband at lunch and when I saw him coming towards me as I was walking with a friend I just wanted to run in the other direction. He was the last person I wanted to see (we were not dating yet, I may have even forgotten what his name was. WHAT? I'm bad at names ok!). So, he comes over to me and I'm trying to hide my red eyes and he asks how my day was. I just burst into tears ago and he tell him I failed me test and then he just hugged me. Out of nowhere. A hug. That 10 second hug was fucking amazing. To this day I have not forgotten it, and how I felt.

So there's my lovey dovey story for the day. Back to regular programming:

School. Ah school. I missed you but now I can't stand you. I got the homeworks and the tests and the "Sorry I'm an idiot, I have no clue what you have been talking about for the last 3 weeks" feelings. Fun.


O here are the cock heart arrows.

SexAY

Birthday Recap

My birthday was great :)

Marc surprised me by taking Friday off and waking up early to cook a big breakfast. I then passed out in the afternoon because I had gotten up at 6am :P. But after all that we went out to dinner. He took me to Madisons Steak house. It was pretty good, very pricey so we wont go often but still very good. I ordered a purple martini (which I am totally going to try and make at home), it was very good. We had fried calamari, Caesar Salad, and Marc had a roast steak with fries while I went with filet mignon (sp?) and vegetables. Now I shouldn't be ordering red meat as it really messes with my body but it had been a couple of months since I had read meat and I wanted to order a steak in a steak house.

After dinner I headed over to a friends house where we got drunk and played a game of life (I won!), did our nails and chatted.

Midway through the night I noticed my stomach was really itchy and after awhile I went to check it out and noticed this 3-4 inch wide red and bumpy band across my whole stomach. I was reacting to something but I couldn't figure out what. Nothing I ate was out of the norm and I had never reacted like that to red meat. On Saturday Marc was out fixing someones computer and talking about my rash/allergic reaction and they said it could have been the tenderizer they used in the steak. So i'm now wondering if that is actually possible (to react to tenderizer). Luckily it is going away, I took some allergy medication and today it's almost gone, still itchy but not as much.

Tomorrow I have an interview, I want this job so much. Wish me luck!

Some pictures of the night:

Purple Martini

Fried Calamari

Salad

Bloody Caesar

Awesome gift from a friend

Life: I'm the white car

NASTY burn

What I wore to dinner (excuse the mess and cat toy)

Cooking: Pork Chops

Today is a little cooler, yah!

We have managed to cut a lot of meat out of our diet. I will try to only have meat about once a week. Some weeks it will happen twice but I try for one. What really sucks is I can not eat red meat anymore. I know I know, it's healthier but I miss my steaks. I did have one a few weeks ago but I paid for it later.

Today was a simple meal: Pork chops on the BBQ, some boiled veggies and a sauce I found in the pantry.

When I BBQ pork chops I always add some garlic paste and come Montreal Steak Spice. I LOVE garlic paste, it is very strong but oh so good. If I could put it on everything I would. Anyways, I put about a teaspoon or so on each chop and rub it in then I lightly sprinkle the chops with the spice. They then go on the BBQ on high heat for a few minutes at which point I turn it down to medium. I like flames when I cook and I get my hand right in there to flip them (Marc hates it :P). I like my chops to be well done so cooking time varies for mine and Marcs.

For the veggies I just stuck 'em in a pot, boiled them on the stove and then put a little butter on them. The sauce was called White Wine Supreme (Fine Cuisine). I didn't like it all that much, it was too rich for me. But Marc liked it.

I forgot to take pictures of the process so here is the only one: I snapped this right before Marc cut it up :)

Deal with it people

You know I hate how some people feel the need to "educate" me on my body. Like I have absolutely no fucking clue what kind of body I have. I mean I don't do my hair in the morning, or my makeup. I get dressed in the dark! Really people? I know what I look like. I mean how do you think I get the clothes I own? Just grab whatever and poof it fits?

I can get into clothes that range from a size 20 to a 26 and a medium to a 3x. I haven't gone onto a scale in a long time because I fucking hate it. It controls so many peoples lives. I do have an idea of what I weigh.

I really do not need people telling me how to work out, what to eat...WHAT I should weigh. The best thing I keep hearing is that "When the husband dies wives lose a lot of weight". So I guess I should get rid of Marc, and then everything will be great. I also get the "You can't be healthy" Well I have to go to the doctors often because of my thyroid and I get checked up and so far the only issue I have is my hypothyroidism. I probably have a lot of stress though...and let me tell you, a glass of wine can help with that :)

I have to say though, that I have yet to get any grief from a complete stranger (at least to my face), the grief I get comes from family. You could say "They only say these things to you cause they care" really? So, when the same exact thing comes from a stranger they are just assholes? Just because family says it doesn't mean they mean well. If they meant well they would bug off. They would stop putting me on diets, they would stop with the pity, stop with the constant work out tips they hear on the view or from some 10 minute beef up DVD. They would stop comparing me to others who lost weight. News flash people: We don't all lose weight the same!

What hurts me the most is that comment "wives lose a lot of weight once their husbands die". It was said to me, and I got asked about my mothers weight. This came from someone I care about a lot, someone I truly love (no not Marc). I think people need to get over this fascination with weight. Why can't I be happy in the body I have now? Sure, I am working on losing some weight but no it's not so I can fit it that size 6 skinny jean. In fact the size I am aiming towards is around an 18ish. If I can't accept the body I have now, if I can't smile and love every roll I have when I stand naked in the mirror, how will I ever love my size 18 body?

My husband loves me. He loves my body. Maybe other people I care about can start loving me for who I am now. Telling me about this new diet will not make me a happy person. I guess I can just start giving them diet information when they tell me about a diet. See how they feel.

This calls for a pina colada!

O job hunting. You suck.

I hate looking for summer jobs. The End.

I still haven't gotten my blood test....oops. I was going to get it on Thursday but I had an early interview and I did not feel like sitting around waiting for a blood test after the interview. I actually wore a suit to this interview. I felt so stuffy! I think I looked good, but I don't know how I will survive in a legal office later in life. This interview was pretty much the only "big" thing that happened this week.

Marc was able to get a prescription from his doctor for his knee high compression stockings. They are not expensive but hey, might as well get some money back right? Speaking of which, we have at least two checks somewhere out there in the mail. Canada post and the union will not come to an agreement, so there is a lot of mail not being delivered. I heard that countries are not excepting mail to Canada because of the lock out.

While at the doctors office, Marc got his results back. No more swimmers! Whooooooooooo. It was a great feeling. He was so happy he didn't have to do more tests or even get another vasectomy. We went out to dinner that night to celebrate :)

My father in law is in the hospital. He finished chemo and now we wait to find out if it did any good and he can go home, or if he needs to stay. I think in about 10 days we might know. It's been stressful, Marc has been on edge and I'm just trying to be there for him. Having one dad leave this year is enough for us, Thank you very much.

Time for a pina colada.

Veins, they hate me.

This humidity! It's disgusting. I miss the cold! I see people comment on how they luuuuurve this weather and I wonder how many of them go from an air conditioned house to an air conditioned car to an air conditioned office. Sure they love the heat....in small doses. Try sleeping in this heat and humidity, try using public transit that refuses to add air conditioning to its buses, only then will I believe that they like this weather. Until then those people who live in air conditioning can kiss my ass. At least I can smile and laugh when winter comes and hear I them bitch and moan about the cold :)

Last week I went for the dreaded blood test to check out my thyroid. I hate blood tests. HATE them. I don't like needles in general but blood tests just make me sweat, shake and flip out. I have many bad memories of blood tests gone wrong and being blamed for it, so when I get a nurse who is nice, calm and gentile it gives me hope that I can maybe handle getting blood tests at some point in my life. When i'm sitting in the chair with my arm extended and the elastic wrapped around my arm I have to keep telling myself that if I can get tattoos I can get one needle! Right?! At least this time that worked because she got a vein on the first shot. My veins like to hide, they are assholes.

Just to get said blood test though was another experience. The doctor who gave me the blood test sheet never put her name, the clinics address, or a fax number on it. I asked her if I could go anywhere and she said yes. I never looked at the paper at the time because I never had an issue with the test papers. So I get to the hospital and find out that I can not get a blood test because the doctor did not fill out the sheet right. Well shit! I am hungry (can't eat before these wonderful tests :P) and got up early so it was hard to hold myself together. I acted as calm as I could and told them that I didn't realize she didn't fill this paper out, and they kept telling me that it was my responsibility to make sure it's filled out. Like I know all the information! They then go on to tell me that I need a doctor, o really?? I HAD a doctor but the wonderful health care system here in Quebec makes sure that you can never get a new one if the old one leaves. Fuckers.

Anyways I am telling them I really need this test, it's for my thyroid and they keep going on about family doctors so I walk away. The receptionist comes to see me and tells me she will try to find the doctors full name. Through all this I am noticing the database for doctors and clinics must really suck because they can not find the clinic I went to. She does eventually find the clinic and gets the doctors first name (we did manage to notice the scribble on the test sheet was her last name). So she adds the doctors info and the clinics fax info to the test sheet and sends me off to do the test. I then get a call yesterday to go in to get my dosage changed :) So thank you to the nice receptionist for helping me out! Between the nice receptionist and the nice nurse taking my blood, the overall experience was great.

Excuse my rambling.

During all that Marc dropped off some sperm to get the second post vasectomy test. We are really hoping this test comes back with no swimmers, if it does he might need to go under the knife again and he's really not keen on doing that. Maybe I can talk to a doctor about a tubal. I'm going to check it out anyways tomorrow when I'm at the clinic, just to see how this doctor reacts. I wonder if he/she would send me to a psychologist? Cause you know I'm messed up for not wanting a child! :P

Life is quiet here. Still nothing on the job hunt. We're heading up the see Marcs family this weekend, his dad hasn't been feeling too good lately. It's been causing some stress with Marc and I, not fighting just stress, dealing with my dad being sick and then passing, and now Marcs dad being sick has been hard on us. My little herb garden is growing :). I am so excited to get some hot peppers from the little plant. I have sage, cilantro, oregano and a hot pepper plant.

Trip is off but it's not the end of the world

Marc saw the doctor yesterday and she said is what ok...until he told her the length of the bus trip, at which point she seemed unsure and nervous. Also his blood is low and that worries me a bit, it hasn't been low in a long time. Anyways we agreed that if the doctor did not give the ok and sounded 100% sure about it we would not go. She said it might be ok if he wears two stockings but even then it wasn't 100%. We do not, I DO NOT need to have someone else in the hospital. We are a little sad that we can't go, we wanted to see family and our little niece (we couldn't wait to see her! She's at that age, over 6 months, where they are a lot of fun). We were going to bring her some gifts (cause she needs to be spoiled by her aunt and uncle) but now we are going to mail them over. The shipping is not too bad so we just need to agree on what to send her lol.

Maybe in a year his leg will be a little better and traveling for long periods will not be that bad. We could have taken the plane but it was too much, and I have never been out there (never been past Toronto) so taking the bus sounded more appealing. Marc and I also like long road trips together :)

Marc decided he is going to get a dehumidifer (I hope that is spelled right), our place gets really humid in the summer and apparently this can help. We don't mind the heat, it's the humidity that is killer. Thing is they are not cheap and we are hesitant to spend almost 300$ on something that may not work well or break down.

The hunt is on!

Samosas and Chutney

Yesterday and today have been beautiful days. the sun has been shinning, the birds are singing and I bought two glasses reserved only for pina coladas. All is right in the world. In all seriousness though, it has been lovely out. I am finally airing out my apartment, I cleaned windows, and I cleaned my car. My skin is loving this weather too, it's not bundled up in leggings or tights and long sleeve shirts. I also bought two new pairs of flip flops yesterday :)

The husband went out and bought samosas because he wants to make a homemade chutney sauce. I am a little nervous as it requires a lot of tamarind and I don't really like tamarind. But if it doesn't turn out good we have some store bought stuff (well made by the owners and packaged to be bought).

Cooking the chutney made the apartment smell a little nasty but once it was cooked and cooled it smelled pretty good. I gave it a try and compared to some other tamarind chutneys I have tried it was one of the better ones :)

Recipe:

Tamarind Chutney

3.5 oz/100g of tamarind pulp, chopped (we used half that amount in tamarind concentrate, and it basically became a broth)
2 cups of water
half a thai chili or to taste, seeded and chopped (we used a jalapeño pepper)
generous 1/4 cup brown sugar or to taste
1/2 tsp salt


Put the tamarind and water in a pan and bring to a boil. Because we used tamarind paste we kept it at a boil for 25 minutes but if you are using the pulp turn the heat to a simmer, stirring occasionally. 


Tip the pulp into a strainer and use a spoon to push the pulp into the rinsed out pan. We skipped this step obviously.


Stir in chili, sugar, and salt and continue simmering for an additional 10 minutes or until the desired consistency is reached. Let cool slightly then stir in extra sugar or salt, to taste.


Let cool completely, then cover tightly and chill for up to 3 days, or freeze. We used some about an hour after cooking it and it tasted good, i'm sure after 3 days it will be better.

P.S. I finally updated my older entries. The dates may be off a bit though but only by 2-3 days. Also this recipe is from Indian Cooking by Beverly Leblanc ISBN: 978-1-4075-4921-7

The wedding.....yawn.

Everybody is gushing over this royal wedding thing. I mean good for them for being happy etc but really it's kinda over the top. But then again I really don't like weddings to begin with.

This morning I had to actually put effort into finding news that wasn't about the wedding. The whole damn world did not stop people! It's so irritating that people are gaga for two people they do not know! And people got up at 3am to watch this? Don't they have lives?

And there is my FB page that is littered with wedding stuff now *gag*

Enough of that.

My dinner plans were almost ruined!! O..MI..GOD!! But they are ok :). I found out that my youngest brother will be leaving for Quebec City on the 4th and will be gone for 3 days. He didn't give me any more information, the bugger, so i'm there wondering how they are counting their days: Will he be home Friday or Saturday or maybe even Sunday if the 4th and 8th are strictly travel days..I did not know! So I called my mom up last night to get the details so I could cancel the dinner if needs be, and I was told he would be coming back on the Friday so all is well in my world of planning.

Insurance might be too much to go to Winnipeg. We checked some places up and we really do not want to spend an arm and a leg going. If I'm spending a lot of money on a trip i'm going south. Also we still don't know if Marc can even go so everything is up in the air. I also need to find a job so if I get one and can't leave then....well we don't leave. In about a week we will know more.

The Heparin Shots

Oh my. Not cheap eh. 
So Marc had the appointment to see a heparin specialist today (poor thing spent literally half the day at the doctors) and he was also able to give himself a shot. It was to see if he would react badly to the shot. he said giving himself the shot was not as bad as he thought.
There is a strict schedule he as to follow while taking these shots:
 6 and 7,  i take nothing (no pills no shots)
 8 (Saturday) I take a shot of 20,000 units.
9 (Sunday) I take a shot of 10,000 units.
 (day of) I get no shot, and start taking my pills that night
 11 (Tuesday) still no shot, take a pill and a half (cuz Tuesday is pill and a half day) -- again pills will be at night, and from now on.
12 - 17 pill and shot (20,000 units)
I'm a little nervous of him not taking any medication for two days but I guess that is to let the blood thicken a bit before the procedure.
Anyway it shouldn't be too bad.
The price of these buggers are 80$ for two needles and the dose. So we are paying about 333$ for all this. WOW. At least the insurance gives us 80% back so overall not to bad. I told Marc if he wasn't sure I would go in to start the process of getting an IUD but he wouldn't let me. I'll check again in a few days and again a bit before the procedure.
The heparin shots he is getting are called: Innohep and he is taking 20,000 units (well he is buying that amount because they come in packs of two and the nurse told him instead of wasting needles he can just push out the extra amount to get the 10,000 units).
Marc may have more to add so this post may be updated or he will make his own.
Besides that we are sad to know that our favorite restaurant is in fact closed on Christmas Eve so we are either going somewhere else or making our own romantic dinner here at home. We shall see what happens.
O and I also passed three of my classes, I am still waiting for one more mark and it's for the class I think I failed too :(

It's a cane world

Totally is. I was thinking today that I really do not notice Marcs cane at all, I don't even remember he has one at times! It has just become part of him....his third leg...or fourth (WOW I need help). I was also thinking about the progression of the cane, from the humble walker cane to the stream lined beast (not really a beast but I'm calling it that).
Random note: My fat tabby is sitting on the computer desk and he likes to dive in for a kiss so forgive any spelling mistakes I might miss.
Yes, Marc started with the walker cane. The cane that has four feet and looks horrible. We were both embarrassed to be seen with that in public but he had a very hard time walking and it gave the most support. After a bit he acquired a new cane. One of those pharmacy curved handle canes. Nothing impressive but It was very old person looking. Yes I can call it that because I am 24 and Marc is 27...we are not old. He searched for stores in Montreal that sell fancy, young looking canes but there was not much available. He then turned to the net and found a few sites. I can not remember the site he got his cane at but Marc insert the link HERE. He searched this website for awhile until he settled on a very nice carbon somethingorother cane. And this stream lined beast has been his cane since April I think. He's going to go buy another cane for the winter, on that is cheap and is ok to get messed up.
This has been a very random post I know and I could add other stuff but I really want to go have lunch.
O! O! O! This weekend we are having our date night here at home. We are going to be making a whole bunch of Indian food...except samosas...we are looking forward to this adventure ^_^

Marc's homemade chili

Carmelize a large onion and 3/4 of a bell pepper (any color of pepper you like) with some hot sauce.

Meanwhile, take a LARGE pot, add 1 1/2 cans of tomato sauce, and 1 can each of diced tomatoes, mixed beans, chic peas, and red kidney beans. Start heating. Add a teaspoon of savoury, a teaspoon of chili powder, and a teaspoon of whole cumin. Oregano is optional.

Add onion/peppers to pot. Re-using your frying pan, cook some hamburger meat (with a bit of water in it, keeps it from getting too hard) with the remainder of the pepper. add chili powder and a teaspoon of whole cumin.
As water is mostly evaporated, add a bit of hot sauce, and the remaining half can of tomato sauce. Sprinkle with black pepper. Simmer for around two minutes, then transfer this to the pot as well.

Cover the pot, and simmer at a low heat, stirring now and then, for around an hour. Keep in mind, this will get spicier as it cooks the cumin.

Makes around 12-15 good sized bowls of chili.

Happy Dance!

Although I have to go to school for one class, and it is only in the afternoon, tomorrow is Thursday but more than that it is the last day of the week. Friday is a ped day! I get to sleep in and get some needed cleaning done and just relax...O I should probably start my paper that is due Tuesday....or not.
I've been so annoyed at my hand the last few days, my right hand has this ache..like my bones hurt in my hand. It hurts to pick a pencil up or just type..hell typing this hurts! And it is only in my hand, specifically the joints on my fingers. Every time i strecth them or move them it just hurts. I hope it goes away and isn't anything serious.
I looked at the school calendar this morning and holy shit there is hardly any school left till the holidays! It's going by so fast...but that means last minute projects will pop up and then I have to deal with finals and I ALWAYS over stress about them, then when I am in the exam I feel like i forgot everything! Horrid.
You know I have to say I am glad I wrote that last post, It isn't something to be told to the world but it's out and well it's over. So in January we find out how the operation goes with heparin. It happens fast and he should be out by dinner (he has to sit around for a bit after just to make sure nothing went wrong). When the hospital called to make the appoitnment we were taken aback when they offered the end of November! We would of taken it but I need to be there to drive him back obviously and that is right near review for midterms and I can't miss any class AND he needs to be on heparin for a few days ahead of time and getting in to see the blood doctor with only 2-3 weeks till the operation is cutting it a litle close.
Besides all that It has been getting darker at about 4:30pm now and I LOVE it. Means the snow will come!! Reminds me that I desperatly need winter boots...I have none :S.
A few days ago I was overcome with this need to take out the Christmas decorations and put the tree up but I had to hold myself back....so sad!

Passed ma midterms! Recipe in post too.

So I passed two midterms so far. Got an 85 (I thought I would fail that one) and an 80. Not bad I say. I have one more midterm left and I get the mark for my word test tomorrow......should be interesting.

Anyways! I went out and me a batman mask, cause i'm cool like that. Apparently we need to dress up on Friday or else pay 5$. I don't mind dressing up and 5$ is not bad BUT  you can't force someone to dress up or to pay 5$ for charity (which I think is just for school purposes). I just think it is all wrong. Anyways, I bought a batman mask anyways because I really do not feel like getting into a spat over it, I wont wear it though until someone says something. Just to see if it's true.
Besides that things are going well, Marcs leg is not swollen or hurting at all. He's been resting it more so it's doing a lot better. School is going well, home life is going well except each day I am closer and closer to getting rid of my calico....well giving her to someone else. I wouldn't but sometimes she just goes to far. Like scratching the box spring in the middle of the night.....constant little scratches.
Marc is cooking supper tonight, he is making a pasta we foung in a cook book my mom gave me. It looked hard so I didn't want to try it but Marc insisted and it's actually really easy :P
Spicy Napolitana Spaghetti

 
2tbsp of olive oil
1 large onion, finely chopped
a good pinch of fine sugar
2 x 14-oz (398ml) cans of tomatoes
1/4tsp crushed chili flakes, or to taste
14 oz (400g) spaghetti
16 oz (450g) jar roasted red pepper or mixed peppers, drained and sliced
3/4 cup of stuffed green olives, drained and sliced
Parmesan to taste

You fry the onion in some oil, add the sugar and cook for 5 minutes or until just softened. While that is cooking put the can of tomatoes in a food processor or blender to make a puree.
Then you add the pureed tomatoes and the chili flakes to the onion pot and season with a little salt and lots pepper (We don't add salt...at least Marc shouldn't). Bring to a boil, then cook, stirring occasionally over a medium heat so that the sauce boils gently for about 20 minutes.
Cook the pasta according to packaging.
Put the pasta in a bowl and pour the sauce over top. For the roasted peppers and olives we slice them in a food processor and add them on top of the sauce...so yummy. Add your parmesan and you're ready to eat!
This serves 4.
It is from the Readers Digest Weeknight Meals Made Easy book 2009. ISBN: 978-1-55475-022-1. (I shortened the process because I didn't want to type it all out but the instructions are the same in the book just more writing and pretty pictures).

Marc's doctor's visit and more

I forgot to update after Marcs Doctors visit a few weeks ago. It went well, he found out that the clot is not genetic (that's good right?!) but they still don't know what caused it. There are other tests they can do but because of the medication they can't give him the tests. Apparently the medication fucks up the tests. So his INR is still at a good level and he actually bought non prescription compression stockings this weekend. They are Sigvaris but the compression is less. He tried them out yesterday and so far he really likes them, if these stockings work it will save us so much money. His doctor gave him to go ahead to try them and said if they don't work it's a 20$ loss. Today is the real test i guess, Marc is wearing one of them to work. What is good about these is not only the price but they are knee high so they do not fall down and annoy him. (he can get knee high prescription ones but they cost 120 and insurance does not cover them).

So Marcs leg is behaving so far and we are glad it has become something we don't worry or think about on a regular basis anymore. I still check his leg out to see how it is doing but we can relax a little bit.

I turned the big 2-4 last Thursday. Wasn't to bad i guess. I hate my birthdays (not because of the age but because almost every year it has been a disappointment.....). This year Marc decided to leave friends out of it and just spend it together. He gave me perfume (Vera Wang Classic...love it!) and some cake lol. On friday he told me to get all dressed up and he took me to a lovely little Italian restaurant. The food was soooo good! I also got new heels which are so comfortable! Anyways so that was my birthday, it was quiet and good.

In less that a month we are off to celebrate our first year wedding anniversary! We can not wait. It will be a well deserved weekend away from everyone and everything. We can't wait to try all the wine and just relax! My super awesome dress is apparently arriving today. I still can not believe that. I ordered it from the states 2 weeks ago and last week i got an email saying they were behind and that it would ship on the 17th. Ok :(  so i checked today and it is already in Montreal. I have NEVER had something ship that fast from the states. Crazy i tell you....Crazy.

Besides all that life is good. We got our new couch and we are toughly enjoying it (although getting it is a whole other story....never buy anything from Leons...NEVER)

My Rant

Last post was made by Marc. And i don't blame him for his anger towards that hospital, i hate them. I do not care if my guts are hanging out of me i will not go to that hospital. I am frankly surprised they didn't kill him.

I have to add to that they should start taking a look at their nurses and maybe train them to not give their opinion on something they know nothing about and also to NEVER tell a person who is not the patient that they are fat. Also your ultrasound technicians either need to get more training or hire more people because waiting over 4 hours for a leg ultrasound is unacceptable...o and also have no record of finding the clot or how big it is is unacceptable. Also tell the people who draw blood to lose the attitude. If i get a call from the family doctor asking me where the blood test is and then we find out they fucked up the blood test and would not of told us till god knows when and then we get told we have to drive all the way back there from Montreal is more than enough reason for me to tell them they suck and to get their act together.And no giving me 3$ to get free parking is not enough, your whole hospital can go fuck itself.

Alright my little rant about the hospital is over. Like i said i will NEVER go back to that place, and if i see that nurse who thinks she's the smartest person i'm going after her.

So we headed up to the parents this weekend and it was fun. We didn't get home till 3am, i think we are still tired from Saturday night. I have the day off and it really sucks. I think i am getting to the end of work, i really need another job.

I ordered a dress about 2 weeks ago and i measured to make sure it was long enough, well it arrived and guess what. To damn short, removing the hem wouldn't save it. I really wanted that dress too. I ordered a skirt and hopefully it will look good.

The Story

So around January 24, 2010 my husband (Marc) was told he had a blood clot. DVT.

The hospital we started with was well.....lets just say they need  either new staff, new equipment or both. The told us that the clot will  be gone by mid-week. We didn't know much about clots then and we were  hopeful that a few shots of heparin would dissolve it and his leg would  no longer be the size of popeyes arm. We were wrong.

Every day that week he had to go in for a shot of heparin in the  stomach. He bruised like crazy, he was extremely tired, had no energy  and just looked lost. None of the doctors really knew anything. There is  a blood clot clinic in downtown Montreal, close to where we live. But  the hospital (an hour away) told us they have everything they need to  care for Marc.

He had to get an ultrasound. That took over 3 hours of waiting and we  eventually found out that they actually never put the information in  the file (where the clot was, about how big it was--that is another  story).

After about 3 weeks of constant hospital visits, him staying at his  parents (which i am so very Thankful for, they stressed me out but i am  so Thankful they were there to help. As well as his aunt and uncle). He  came home. He needed a cane to walk and even then he could barely walk  for 10 minutes without pain. He needed constant rest and was (still is)  on Cumadin.

Eventually, after constant calls to his doctor and me ready to punch  his nurse in the face he got seen by the blood clot clinic. Ever since  he has been there his energy and his outlook on having DVT is so much  better! They give him so much information, they told him to get  compression stockings (a post will come about this) and he got a stylish  cane.

They actually give proper ultrasounds for blood clots and get the  results fast. They know what they are talking about and have lots of  experience.

So it's the end of July. He was told the clot is almost completely  dissolved and he can actually walk for a long time without his leg  balloning up or causing pain (compression stockings are amazing!!).

I still get asked when he will have a normal life. Marc has a normal  life, he is a little slower but he is still Marc. Still the man i love.  Still the man i told i would be with in sickness and in health. He is  still living a normal life.

Sorry but today is a double post day, and it’s a novel.

I haven't gone into how i felt during all this. I felt many things-anger all the way to fear.

At first i was lost. I hate going to the hospital (i almost died from  my gallbladder just by not going to the hospital till the last minute)  and taking Marc to the hospital for some weird leg issue was  frightening.

When we were told it was a clot he got his shot of heparin and we  headed to his parents house. He was so tired, from being up till 2am and  from getting the shot. He fell asleep but i stayed awake checking his  chest to see if he was still breathing. I barely slept that night (and  for many nights after), and when i did I would awake with a start and  check his chest again.

I had to leave on Tuesday night for school the next day. Not being  able to check if he was still breathing at night made me very emotional.  I was scared that he would die and i would not be with him. I would be  at our place because i had to go to school and i couldn't be there by  his side if he died. I know it's crazy to think that but when you are  told it's a clot and you know they can travel and kill---it's a scary  thing.

I headed back to his parents Wednesday night and i stayed for a few  days, bringing him back and forth to the hospital for daily blood tests  and shots. I then went home again, without him, but he was able to come  home that Sunday. (In my first post i said he was gone 3 weeks....it  felt like it...but he was gone a week and we had to go back up there  almost every day for about 3 weeks. Those days were a blur so times are a  little messed up).

In all this though, i'm sure i annoyed the family (constant worrying  and stressing--i don't handle stress well) and they annoyed me (why  would they want to keep my husband, why can't i take him home with me! I  know it was better he stay there though, closer to the hospital and his  parents were home all day). But, like i said, i'm so glad they were  there to help.

Even while he was back home with me though, i would get up and check  if he was breathing. I got very little sleep, it affected everything in  my life. I had no energy and i was in my first semester at University.  The stress was to much and my marks began to show it. I would try so  hard not to cry in front of Marc, i had to be strong for him. He was so  confused, and angry. Having his wife bawl in front of him wouldn't help.

Every day i would wonder if this was the day the clot would move. I  was so terrified of losing him. Only being married for just over 3  months and i lose my husband, that's not fair!! Maybe praying would of  helped, i don't know. I'm not religious at all but i hoped someone out  there was praying for him.

His blood started to stabilize, he got a shiny fashionable cane and  he was being seen by specialists. Our out look started to get better. I  was sleeping more and more at night, my head wasn't a mess of stupid  thoughts and tears and our sex life was back on track (i know, i  know...TMI but it helped and it made us feel back to normal again).

I think though the happiest moment (i mean the moment that made me  cry tears of happiness for the first time in so long) was when Marc told  me his clot is almost dissolved. We made it. Sure he could be on this  medication for life, sure he needs to wear compression stockings and  walk with a cane but i don't care. He is still Marc, he is still the man  i love and will always love.

So that's how i felt. A lot of days were hard, nights even harder but  we made it. I think this was the first big trial in our marriage (there  will be more) but if we made it through this--through fighting, tears  and fears--then i think we will be alright.

And seriously i should not write while at the office <em>:P</em>

Today… today is Wednesday.

Yesterday was quite the disaster. No work meant me surfing all day  and spinning in my chair. I got pretty down about it, wanted to cry.  Also not getting an email about shipping costs for the dress i wanted to  buy was not helping. Luckily when i got home after work there was an  email and i was surprised at how cheap (and awesome: Tracking included,  insurance) the shipping was, and that's coming from the states! I look  forward to getting the dress in the mail, i just hope it looks good on  me.

Marc bought me and himself some wine. I enjoyed one of my favorites  (Merlot Donini Delle Venezie i.g.t. 2008) and he got some kind of  blackberry wine i think (it tasted like a frezzy). Anyways i was  supposed to cook chicken last night for tonight but i completely forgot  so i think we're having Alfredo tonight. Marc makes a good Alfredo.

I was....i guess sick last night. My right leg was aching so bad and i  felt dizzy so i took some strong Tylenol and man did i feel better! I  try to stay away from Tylenol because it used to make me sick but i  think i might be passed that. And i just realized that i forgot the  bottle at home. Crap. We carry Tylenol now (instead of Advil) because it  wont mess with his clot and medication. He was sad about not being able  to take Advil but so far the kind of Tylenol we got (i think it's the  fast acting one, in the little capsules) is working out. Also he can  still take robax for when his back hurts, I take some too if i have a  really bad migraine and just want to pass out-works pretty well.

I really have no clue what i'm going to do today. My boss said she  has some things for me to do..but she said that yesterday. If no,t i'm  going to work on personalizing my blog, we'll see how that goes. Or i  can spend the day poking Marc to make sure he's awake.Yeah, I like  option 2.

Besides that, Marcs leg is good today. I try to look at it every  night to see how swollen it gets but the compression stockings are  really helping with that. His leg looks less like a balloon and more  like a normal mans leg.

Friday!

It is about 7:30am and the construction in the office has already  begun. Constant hammering right on the wall behind me. This could be a  long day. However, tonight we are headed to a friends house. Marc is  RPGing it up and I'm just going to hang out, should be fun.

So Marcs ultrasound is not on the 5th (like i mentioned in another  post) it is actually on the4th i think. And Marc if i am wrong again  just write it in a comment :P.  I have an interview on the 3rd and i am  freaking out about it! It's just an office job, entry level-nothing big  but still I need a job for the fall and if i have this job, rather than  spend forever looking for a job again-my stress levels will be down and  we can build up our savings and fun money.

I'm not really sure what to wear to the interview, i know i have to  look good but....i still feel like i have nothing in my closet :P. I  think we might buy a new hookah this weekend or at least a new pipe (i  think our pipe is dieing), might grab some more strawberry sheesha (sp?)  too.

If Saturday is cool i plan on making a big Indian dinner. Butter  chicken, an appetizer, have some samosas. MMMM i'm drooling thinking  about it.